I gave up making New Year’s resolutions in 2010 because I realized that resolutions focus too much on what we’ve done wrong rather than what we’ve done right.
Every year since then I’ve made a list of “non-resolutions,” that is a list of things that I accomplished over the past year that made me happy and proud.
This year the task of figuring out what made me happy and proud over the past twelve months has proven harder than ever before. That’s because this year I completed my most recent book project (a memoir about meeting my biological family) but still haven’t been able to find a publisher for it.
After working on that one single project for 4 1/2 years, it’s difficult to accept the fact that it may not get published.
But the truth is it may not.
As a result of that realization, I made a big change in my life and that’s what led me to my first non-resolution…
1) I’m most proud of the fact that this past summer I decided to make writing fiction my top priority so that I wouldn’t have to spend 4 1/2 years writing another book that didn’t get published. Instead I’ve committed to writing a book a year with the hope that if one of those books doesn’t get published, it won’t be as devastating as it has been when a book I worked on for YEARS doesn’t.
2) I feel truly lucky to be in a healthy marriage with a loving and supportive spouse who really gets me. And I feel equally lucky to have SO MANY great family members and friends that I don’t even have enough time to see them all in a given year.
3) I’m glad that I’m starting to learn to let things roll off of me a bit more. Those petty arguments we have with friends and family? They’re just not getting to me as much, and I’m not engaging with the drama that comes with those relationships, which is making me MUCH happier.
4) I’m also happy that I’ve continued to work out almost every single day, and I’ve added biking and swimming to my regular mix of walking, running, and going to boot camp.
5) I’m pleased, too, that I have continued to reject the notion that being skinny is more important than being healthy. I lost a few pounds this year, but some days those lost pounds show up on the scale like that loser ex-boyfriend who still writes on your Facebook wall twenty years after you dumped him. On those days, I just remind myself I’d rather be healthy than worry about a few measly little pounds (and to block said ex-boyfriend on Facebook).
That’s it for me this year!
I sincerely hope that you can take a few minutes today to focus on what you did RIGHT last year too.
Trust me, it feels REALLY good to do so.